Hot Wheels Can't Beat This

Picture this.
A shopping trolley full of broken toys. Completely to the hilt.
Now this.
A bucket full of rubbish. You know, KFC boxes, old coke cans, bits of paper, etc etc.
And this.
The excess juice and slime and muck that you find in a wheelie bin after rain, or even after a bag has broken open inside. Commonly known as bin juice.
How about this?
A commercial compactor filled with all of that kind of stuff.

Sounds pretty normal right? I mean, a business has got to throw out it's trash somewhere, so it puts it in a compactor which gets emptied when it needs to.

Now imagine this...said compactor has had the truck come to pick it up and take it to be emptied...but due to it being broken and, hmm, "slightly" overfilled, it spills out over the ground. Not just any spill, but about ankle depth in an area of about 5x2.5 metres. Not good?

So that the compactor container can be returned an hour or so later, the entire spill has to be moved so that the container can be put back on the ground and pushed back to where it sits. Enter me.

Now visualise this.
I'm outside from 9:45 till 11:00 in the morning, hot, humid and sunny weather, with plastic bags as gloves, shoveling (with a shovel, duh) aforementioned grime, toys and juice into broken trolleys. I'm getting woozy from the smell (like when you get woozy from too much petrol fumes), I'm caked in sweat in a heavy polo shirt, my shoes are covered in it, and pretty much every person that drives by has a good rubberneck (though I can hardly blame them). A few pedestrians walking pass comment on the size and grossness of the task laid in front of me. At the nearby pedestrian crossing I notice at least once a mother point to me while talking to her kids who all run back and have a nice gawk at the unfortunate soul I am, probably saying something like "That's disgusting, I'm going to complain to centre management about that pollution problem" or "See that man kids? He must've annoyed his boss an awful lot to get that job!"

Hear this though: I didn't want the job, nor did I get punished with it. I did it 'cause somebody had to do it. I could've easily said to Tom when he asked if I wanted to clean it up "Nah, make Adem do it. I ain't touching that." But how would that have looked when I'm trying so hard to make employee of the year? And anyway, I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. Well, maybe Ryan...best mates can sometimes be the same thing hahaha.

Somebody has to do the dirty work at some point...and this was a point where I did some. I filled six (6) trolleys with that stuff. And our trolleys are bigger than Coles, Woolies and the like, quite simply 'cause the majority of our stock is bigger. That's a lot of bin crud.

But hey...I'm thankful I didn't get the second half of the job...taking the trolleys one by one back inside, out to the truck dock, and then putting all that filth back into the compactor. All by hand. No shovel for that poor boy.

Till next time,
I guess you'll "Smell me later"!
LOLROFLNOOBZ.

Long Time No See

Well my friend,
It has been a long time. Quite a long time, about six months roughly. But I'm back, and I'm here to party. A lot has happened since I last jeked about VS Commodores. Monsters, Inc. and Family Force 5.
I won't (see: cant be bothered to) fill you in on the details, so I'll leave you with some entertaining photos I found whilst net-trawling. But I will return! With a vengeance!!